Yes, I am still alive!
The good news that I still have to pinch myself when I say this, I'M PREGNANT!! We are super duper second trimester pregnant!
I have all the blog posts that I have written over the last 3 months, but I am very verbose and there are some things that I do want to keep to myself!
But I can break it down for you.
November 21, 2013- I was actually at the hospital with my sister for her surgery. She had discovered that at 10 weeks she had a miscarriage. While one life was being taken away upstairs, I prayed so hard that a new life was just beginning for us. Fast forward to 1:30pm, I am outside with a customer at work showing granite selections off when the number I have memorized pops up. The amazing nurse that was with us from the very first appointment, who told me on transfer day that she was so confident in our little "fighters" told me my HCG was 117. I was pregnant! PREGNANT! IVF REALLY WORKED!! I screamed and then had to politely excuse myself from customers. PREGNANT! Went home and got to celebrate with Mike. He was elated! We knew this was it, this was our happily ever after.
November 22, 2013- I got to go to the hospital we had originally started at and give my favorite nurse the news. She even prayed over the little tube of blood that she took from me. Thankfully there wasn't much of a wait this time. Our number was 240! It had doubled in 1 day! Things were so surreal.
November 25, 2013- Went back for a follow up where the HCG should be in the 500's. All day I had major cramp like pains that made me worry. I prayed constantly. I wanted God to show he was in charge of this journey! I specifically asked God to make the number at least 480. Just so it doubled. 545.6! I will never understand why I question My God!
November 28, 2014- The number had continued to double and was well in the 2000's now. Our first glimpse at the tiny miracle that I prayed so long would come.
It's intentionally blurry, because I am not really supposed to have this picture.
December 9, 2013- A normal day at work. Mike called and I remember telling him my stomach just felt weird. I thought I just needed the bathroom (TMI, I know). Around 4 is when I noticed the blood. I called Mike who was on his way, and drove myself to the ER. The cramps started pretty bad, and I just felt like I couldn't breathe. I was devestated. How could this happen again? After 9 hours in the ER, that included not getting put into a regular room until almost midnight, an ultrasound tech trying to make conversation, about how fast children grew up, at one point she even asked me "you know, it just happens so fast, while I just turned my head and cried, and also included a very exhausted me looking at Mike and saying "why don't we just leave, we know what's happening." Consider me shocked when at 1:42am they diagnosed me with a
Subchorionic Hematoma (SCH). The baby was alive and fine! We were told to go home and rest.
December 15, 2013- Happy Anniversary husband! I am at church when I get extremely lightheaded. I get sweaty, clammy, and the room starts spinning. I go to the bathroom and see more blood, worse this time. Another visit to the ER, where Mike left work and met me there, and at one point I got so sick, I ended up accidentally throwing up all over him. The man didn't even FLINCH! He just sat there, and rubbed my back, and soothed me. More tests were run, but in the end our little fighter is still around and kicking away.
This was taken 2 days before the ER visit. The darker shade to the right is the SCH.
January 6, 2014- Our first OB appointment, what a surreal moment, to think I would never have this, and to see this tiny miracle that we fought so hard for. After an ultrasound they determined the SCH is still there, and is significant. We were referred to the high risk specialist who will take over care from here on. The high risk specialist informed us that a normal delivery might be out of the question, but it would take time to determine definitely.
February 14, 2014- Another appointment with the high risk specialist where she discovered the sex of the baby. We wouldn't know for almost a week, but the anticipation was worth it. That post is coming.
My scrunched up Valentine.
February 18, 2014- The best birthday cake I have ever had. Mike and Marie Duncan who have never had it easy when it came to having a family, got to cut into a cake and discover we are having a little GIRL!!! Grace Rebecca Duncan, I can't wait to meet you and finally hold you in my arms.